I have recorded every cell phone call you’ve ever made. Every text message that you have sent along with every picture you have taken. I know who you have talked to, when you talked to them and what you said word for word. This information is safely stored in my database, and I can pull it up at a moment’s notice. I hope you haven’t talked about anything illegal, immoral, embarrassing or personal, because it’s not personal anymore and I have it all. I also have all your e-mails and every computer keystroke, along with every website you’ve ever been to, what you’ve bought and where it was sent. I have gotten to know you very well from all your digital communication and isn’t this wonderful? I think it is. I have also photocopied the face of every letter that you’ve sent or received through the post office.